Abundant Blessings!

You know those times when you are drifting off to sleep and you think, "Man, I nailed it as a wife and mom today. I was loving, self-controlled, patient, gentle, happy, relaxed, energetic, on schedule, and my kids thrived on it. They were well behaved and respectful all day. My husband and I laughed throughout the day and we were sweet, gracious, and Christ-like in our marriage. Today was such a successful, wonderful day."

Yeah, me too.

I can honestly say I fall asleep like that more often than not.

But, not last night.

Last night I laid there thinking, "I am a failure as a wife and as a mom. I am short-tempered, no fun, and mean. I wish I could have a do-over."

That is not a good way to fall asleep.

I am thankful that I get to ask forgiveness and have it wiped clean off my slate. I needed to do some rounds in that department--- God, my husband, and my children.

I told God that tomorrow (today), I wouldn't be someone I didn't like.

Then, I didn't get any sleep and both boys woke up shortly after I got up at 4:50am (my husband is working 48hrs straight today and I needed to send him with 2 days worth of breakfast, lunch, dinner, and snacks. My crock-pot meal needed something added in the last hour of cooking.). They were hyper and wide awake at 5:30am.

Gotta love how the devil works.

I refuse to give in to my flesh today though.

Today will be a better day!

To help it be a better day, I want to spend just a little bit of time thanking God for some unbelievable blessings!

Now hold on tight, because you are probably going to be as blown away as I am when I stop and think about it!

Since moving to Cartersville, we have seen the hand of God at every corner. I say that is proof we are where He wants us.

We found an amazing church and have some of the best friends we have ever had. True friends.... not just Sunday morning friends. We have friends that seem to truly love us and care about us. Friends that meet unknown needs in our life just by being them.

I had a friend give me clothes (BAGS and BAGS!!!) from cleaning out her closet (for me which made it 100x better. LOL). Another friend GAVE us a massive picture that I stated I loved one day (when she moved and had no place for it) that wasn't a need, but I desperately wanted something just like that in my living room. We have even been given the gift of raw milk and fresh farm eggs just because friends knew we liked those things and grabbed us some while they were at a local farm. My aunt randomly sent a Starbucks giftcard in the mail that came at the perfect time (you know those times, you just need some reminder that God cares about our most insignificant want. I literally told my husband the day before, "Man, I would love some Starbucks, but I'm not going to spend that $$ right now.) and meant the world to me because it was so random and thoughtful.

Just lots of random gifts that came at the right moment and were total and complete blessings. The Lord used each and every gift to bless me and to meet a need (technically a want, but you get the point.).

I have been praying since long before we moved that God would use me and grow me. Before moving, I had felt so dead and dry spiritually. Hindsight is 20/20 and I can see that I was dry and dead now that I have been growing for 7 months.

That is a blessing in and of itself. God supplied an alive church that preaches the truth. Our preacher truly has a preacher's heart. It is obvious he is in the right profession. I have learned SOOOO much since we began attending back in October. I also love our SS class. It is amazing the amount of knowledge I have gained in 7 months. It makes me wonder how I was ever content to not grow.

I also still attend Bible study once a week. It is a very in-depth study. We have studied through Galatians, Hebrews, 1 Thessalonians, and we are finishing up 2 Thessalonians the next 2 weeks. I cannot begin to tell you what all I have gained from that. Not only Biblical knowledge, but friendships, and so much more. I praise God for moving us here so I could be involved in a mid-week study like I found. We will study Romans next year and I look forward to that.

I have continued to pray and ask God to grow me. I was presented with the opportunity of leadership at Bible Study 2 weeks ago. I was asked to lead in the children's ministry (around the ages of my children most likely) next year. My first thought was, "No, not me. I am not equipped at all. I still have oodles of growing to do myself." I prayed for a week though and spoke to my core group leader after praying for a week and still feeling like that was not where I was supposed to be. She shed lots of insight on me and gave me some inside information to how picking leaders at CBS worked that made my heart question my "no" answer. I asked her to please pray hard for me that day because I was supposed to have an answer the following day.

That night, I wrestled in my sleep. I could not fall asleep. I began praying about that opportunity again and I prayed and prayed for direction, begging God to change my heart if my "no" answer was not in line with His will. It was like God Himself was standing in the room and said, "You want to grow, right? As a leader, you will grow far more than as a bystander. I would not open this door of opportunity for you if this was not where I wanted you. This is MY will for YOUR life. I will use this to bless you and to grow you."

I was able to fall asleep and I woke up with complete peace that this was God's will for me right now.

Not just that, I felt complete peace about not working with children my age and with being much older children (4th grade-highschool, I don't know where, that is just what I felt like God was telling me.). There are tons of children in that age range because they are all homeschooled.

On Thursday, I was getting ready to attend a birth of a first-time mom. I was loading my car and my phone rang. It was the CBS teacher calling to get my answer. I told her the whole story about wrestling to come to a decision and then I told her what age group I felt led to serve in. She said they rarely have ladies wanting to serve in that age group and that was also an answered prayer for them.

I really and truly feel complete peace and although I don't feel equipped, my core leader reminded me when I spoke with her, "God doesn't call the equipped. He equips the called." (Thanks, Tricia!) So I am looking forward to becoming equipped and growing so much more!!

Back up a few weeks.

Brent is about to start the paramedic program in May.

It will cost us quite a bit of money out of pocket for books, uniform, and then his tuition after HOPE runs out. Plus, his truck gets terrible gas mileage and he will be driving to Rome 3x a week. That is about a 30 mile drive one way. His truck also has no air which will suck for summer.

We have questioned how to pay for all that after reexamining our budget and cutting back where we can and we also want to get completely out of debt (we keep almost getting out and then things come up.), while somehow saving for the unexpected.

A few weeks ago, I reluctantly offered to find more houses to clean. It is good money, but after 5 years of cleaning houses for folks, I'm a bit over it. It is hard work and I just don't enjoy it. I told Brent I would do it while he was in school and then I would stop.

I posted on FB and didn't hear anything back (my thoughts----YAY/What are we going to do?).

When the devil tried to use fear to get me off track, I literally sat on the couch praying out loud while the boys played. This is what I said almost word for word,

"Lord, You know our need. You know what we can afford and You know where we will fall short. It is scary to think about what we are going to need that we don't have. Even though paper says it is impossible, I trust You to meet the impossible need. I KNOW You will provide. You have never let us go without before. I believe You will take care of us and provide more than just what is necessary, I know You will provide abundantly. I don't know how You will do it or when You will do it, but I trust You. I know beyond a shadow of a doubt, when You provide, I will stand back in amazement and awe of how You chose to provide and meet our needs and I will have no choice except to tell others of how amazing You are. It will be a way I never thought of and it will be more than enough. You are always good and we trust You and love You for using times like this to show your power and might."

I remember this prayer because I believed it will all my heart and I knew I would be sharing some miracle on my blog.

Now, fast-forward back to the Thursday when I said "Yes" to CBS leadership and was headed to a birth.

I worked alongside my most favorite midwife in the whole wide world!! Carolyn Drake. She was Webb's midwife and I truly LOVE her. We work together a lot at births. Being a homebirthin' momma myself (HEHE) I love/prefer attending homebirths. They are my passion. They are my expertise, if you will. They bring me joy. I lurve them. I want to kiss them all over.

Ok, things just got weird.

Like I was saying, I live for homebirths. If there was a way to make that what I attend the majority or all of the time, I would jump on that.

After this amazing momma birthed a gorgeous and plump baby boy on Thursday, Carolyn asked me a question that made my heart soar!!!

She asked me if I would like to be her full-time doula. That would mean I work alongside them at every first-time mom's birth (an average of about 2 births a month, give or take). She already requires them to hire a doula, but now, it would just automatically be me. I would be a part of her "village". She said lots of things to me that I will have tucked away in my heart forever. Things that gave me confidence as a doula and made me excited to work with her.

I don't even know what I said in the beginning. I was so shocked speechless! I think I just sat there nodding while my brain ran absolutely crazy.

Would I want that position????!!!!

Was she kidding????!!!!!

YYYYYYEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSS!!!!! A million drillion times, YES!!!!! Of course I would take this amazing opportunity.

That is a sought after position (at least in my opinion). If I could choose who to work alongside and team up with and I had the option of everyone in the world, it would be Carolyn Drake. I love her. I seriously do. I tell all my clients that use her how much I adore her. This means I work in the field of my passion with someone I like, not someone I don't like (LOL). Not that I mind doing hospital births (especially for friends and family) or that I never want to do another one, it just means I work most of the time where my heart is. My personal experience in with homebirth.

Am I stoked? You bet.

When I left her house, I called my husband and through tears told him how God had provided. He, of course, was beyond thrilled! The need for his schooling should be met and it will be met by me working a job I LOVE!!!!!! My dreams have come true. I'm serious. I have been on cloud 9 since last Thursday. I am in amazement, just like I predicted.

God is soooooooo good. So very good.

I will also say, I question whether or not that door would have ever been opened had I not accepted the open door of CBS leadership. I think I would have said "no" to the leadership if I had accepted the job position first and that is not what God wanted for me. I would have thought I didn't have the time... and He wants me doing both.

I am HAPPY!!!!

Being in God's will is the best. The week before we moved here, I was at a birth with Carolyn and she and her apprentice were asking me (in a joking way) if I HAD to move? They wanted to be able to work with me still. At that moment in time, I was so sad and depressed feeling and questioned God and His will. I couldn't believe God was taking me from my opportunity. I remember being sad/crying/being a brat to my hubby about it because I would miss out on so much. It is funny because all of my jobs since moving have been in the Chattagnooga area working with Carolyn's clients and now, that is where all my work will come from. My parents are there to keep my kids and it is the best case scenario for me.

Isn't God so good????

I stand amazed and I had to share since I told God I would :-)



I'm already in a happy/thanksgiving mood!

Headed off to have a wonderful day with my boys.


*****UPDATED!!!*****

Wow, I cannot believe I left this part of the story out.

Yesterday, in the kitchen, Brent and I were discussing a financial need we have. I didn't pray about it or anything right then, we just discussed it.

15 minutes later, he went to get the mail.

He came back in with check in the amount of our need!

I am not joking here, although it must seem like I am.

It is a reimbursement type thing from a company that went under that is under a law suit or something (It has to do with Brent, not the 2 of us so I'm a little cloudy on the details). Money owed to us we didn't even know about.

(We watched Facing the Giants the night before.....)

Tell me....

What is impossible with God??

NOTHING!!!



I hope you know Him :-)