Provision

I have had this story on my mind all night and all day.

Usually when that happens, God is trying to show me something or remind me of something. He wants me to open up my eyes and see it.

There was a time in my life that I was a single-mom. I think that is documented here somewhere.

During my single-mom days, income was low. I was in school, cleaning house, and keeping a little girl a few days a week.

At our church we had an annual Missions Conference. We were asked to commit to a certain amount of money, whatever God laid on your heart, and then in FAITH commit to give it each month. No matter what.

I committed my amount and for the most part, never truly struggled to give that in faith each month.

There was one Sunday that I went to church and even though I knew it was the end of the month and my mission money was due, it was literally the ONLY money I had in my bank account. Down the the dollar. There was some change in there, but not an extra $1.

I prayed and asked God to provide and went home and noticed that my gas tank was on Empty. We lived about 30 minutes from church.

"Now unto Him that is able to do exceeding abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that worketh in us."
-Ephesians 3:20

I drove back to church that night for Sunday evening service. I very clearly heard the Lord tell me, felt Him lead me, convict me-- however you want to look at it, "Give your mission money". I was so scared because I knew I couldn't make it home on the amount of gas I had and there would be $0.74 left in my bank account after I wrote my check.

I wrote my check and prayed asking God to provide the money before the check I just wrote cleared at the bank.

"Let us therefore come boldly unto the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy, and find grace to help in time of need."
-Hebrews 4:16

I told not another soul about this situation.

It was a cold evening and as I pulled into the gas station, my grandparents pulled in behind me.

I got out and pulled my coat tight around me as I watched my grandparents pull up to the pump next to me. My Boppa came over and said, "Get in the car. I'll do this for you." I handed him my debit card and said, "Thanks!" He said, "No. Your gas is on me and Gran. Get in the car while I pump it."

Speechless I got in the car. I saved my tears for the ride home and I didn't even tell my grandparents that story for months... maybe a year even.

About how God used them.

I'm sure they listened to God as he said, "Get out and pay for her gas."

That story is precious to me and such a great reminder that God knows my need. He sees my life from beginning to end and even though stepping out in faith, no matter the situation, might be scary, when I know He holds my life in the palm of His hand, I can Fear Not.

"Fear thou not; for I am with thee; be not dismayed; for I am thy God: I will strengthen thee: yea, I will help thee; yea, I will uphold thee with the right hand of my righteousness."
-Isaiah 41:10

"Declaring  the end from the beginning..."
-Isaiah 46:9a

"Behold, I have graven thee upon the palms of my hand..."
-Isaiah 49:16a

He loves me so much and He will ALWAYS provide. BUT!!! Here is what I have learned, He doesn't provide so that I will then step out in faith. No, waits for me to step out in faith and THEN He proves Himself faithful. He wants me to prove I trust Him before He shows me His great and wonderful plans. Faith isn't seeing..... I wouldn't be showing Him that I had faith if I knew my Boppa would pay for my gas that night so then I felt secure in writing that check. No, he wanted the check first and then the gas would come.

And, he doesn't always provide in the way I tell Him to, or think He should, or try to manipulate Him to. No. His ways are very rarely my ways and His thoughts are not my thoughts.

"For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, saith the Lord. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts."
-Isaiah 55:8-9

This story is great for so many other areas of my life where finances are not concerned. God is faithful. He is good. He loves me. He sees me. He knows me. He will provide for me. He will take care of me. I can trust He will provide my gas when I am on empty because He has proven that to me time and time again.

"But my God shall supply ALL your need according to His riches in glory by Christ Jesus."
-Philippians 4:19 

Pray for the Boppa I mentioned in this story. He is undergoing back surgery as I type.