Webb-- My Tasmanian Devil

Webb.

He is so sweet. So lovable. So precious. So unbelievably easy going.

That must be why these past 3 days have taken there toll on me!

It started out with him taking his daddy's water bottle. I heard him filling it up with our spare fridge (the one we keep in our utility room/walk-in pantry). He told me he was drinking it when I question him. Little ole me, believed him. I noticed he had made a few trips (maybe 4 or 5) to the fridge and back to the living room. I didn't think anything of it.

I heard a splashing sound coming from the living room and went to inspect. I saw that there were 6, you read that right, SIX, large puddles of water and when I walked in, he was in the process of pouring another puddle. I gave him an evil look and he smiled his sweet little innocent smile at me. I went and got 2 towels and took it as an opportunity to mop my floor. I got onto him and told him that was a no no and he would get a spanking if he did that again.

So, he decided on another form of disaster.

Brent was at the gym for the water bottle incident.

While I was cooking dinner and Brent and I were discussing some things, Dane screams, "MOM! DAD! YOU BETTER COME QUICK!!" I give Brent a look and we both head towards the sound. It was coming from the boys bathroom. I get there first and just keep on walking past because I started laughing. When I glanced in the bathroom, I see a naked Webb standing by the toilet waiting on us and toilet paper strung everywhere, dipped multiple times in the potty, shredded in the floor, etc. I gain my composure and go in. Brent is crouched down questioning Webb. Webb says, "I had to wipe my nose and goobie." Of course, all the fire went out of Brent on that one. We call it  a goober and I have never heard Webb refer to it. So hearing him call it a goobie just cracked us both up. Brent then showed him how to get just a little bit to wipe his nose and goobie. LOL.

A few minutes later, I had dinner on the table. The boys came to sit down and I was at the sink. When I turned around, Webb had taken his fork and strewn his homemade sloppy joes EVERYWHERE. They were on the table, his lap, chairs next to him, and the floor.

The next day, (Webb is known to waste food, so I am picky about him helping himself). He got 2 bananas on 2 different occasions and gave them to the DOG!!!! I was super irritated because I don't like any food being wasted, but especially produce. And to think my DOG ate that instead of me???!!! URG.

I had a friend come over for coffee and she and I were in the kitchen and I noticed Webb had been quiet. Dane went in search of him and exclaimed that I needed to come ASAP!! I went to my bathroom and Webb was calmly sitting on the floor with bandaids opened and put all over my hardwood. I'd say 10 bandaids on my hardwood and 15 on the tile in the bathroom. Since he cannot open bandaids, each wrapper was shredded into a million pieces.

That afternoon, I was organizing our utility room/pantry and I realize again that Webb is quiet which has started bringing on agonizing fear. Dane offers to go find him (I think he likes being the one to deliver bad news that gets Webb in trouble) and screams for me to come. I yell, "Am I going to be mad?" He yells, "OH YEAH!!!"

I come into the office and see Webb sitting in the floor with arts and crafts everywhere and something all over my hardwood. My initial thought was it was permanent marker. When I realized it was just liquid glue, I reacted much better.

Reason #23399393 wood floors are mandatory with 2 little boys. In case one of them decides to dump out an entire thing of liquid GLUE!!!

It really worked to his favor that I originally thought it was a marker. It cleaned up super easy and I prayed that they would go to bed early. This momma was exhausted!

Seriously, I think I listed 6 things. That is all my mind would bring up tonight. My mind is fried. Today has been just as insane with him getting into everything and causing destruction. Every time he is quiet, my heart starts racing as I search for him. Please let it be fixable and easy to clean up. PLEASE!!!!

Last night, the little booger WOULD NOT go to sleep. 

Can you tell my left boob looks funny? It is stuffed with an ice pack.

He stayed up with me until 10pm and then once I put him in bed with me, he tossed and turned until after 10:30pm.

I was so tired. I woke up tired and my left breast more engorged than it has been. It has been large, painful, and small lumps.

Before bed last night, I checked it out and there were bruises surrounding it and visible LARGE lumps all over. Even under my armpit there are lumps. It is sooo hard and big (about a D- my other is about a B, small C- so it looks funny! LOL). I took some rated X pics to send Brent and show him and I would totally post them here (you know I'm not scared to be completely open with you after I posted Webb's birth pics), but it is sort of hard to tell and really gross!

When I woke up this morning, I had plans to hit the gym (I haven't since Saturday because of my left breast. It has been that painful. You know I'm hurting if I skip the gym.), but I felt more engorged than I have this far (hard to believe since I have been feeling ENGORGED!!!!). I went back to sleep knowing sleep was most important. I messaged a friend who told me it sounded like I have a clogged milk duct and to keep ice on it and to manually express some milk to let the pressure off. She said to gently massage (OUCH!!!) and to REST!

After Bible study/tornado warnings/drills/sirens, I decided to start massaging and expressing.

As engorged as it is, I could not get any milk out. I knew my friend had been right, it had to be a clogged duct. I massaged and massaged and worked with it for a few minutes and I could finally get a very good flow going. I did that until the pressure was off and continued to massage. Then I applied ice. I already feel better and can lift my arm up. I couldn't do that this morning it was so engorged and lumpy. I will do that again tonight and apply more ice to it.

I can't believe how hard it is weaning Webb. It was so simple with Dane.

Have any of you experienced similar symptoms when you weaned???

BTW, we had tornado warnings all day and a pretty bad one hit in Adairsville. Just a bit north of us in Cartersville. Brent called in because he couldn't sit still here watching the news, so he has been at work since about 12pm and he will work this entire shift (till 7am). Please pray for him, the other first responders, and the victims. Church was canceled tonight and Bible study was dismissed early (after we spent our entire time out in the hallways prepared for a tornado) so it was been a lazy day and night!

Have a safe evening!

Weaning Webb

You may remember that just this past Saturday, I talked about the process of weaning Webb. It was really no process at all. Just a toddler who was addicted and a mommy who loved her little boy and saw no harm in it/didn't have the willpower to say "no" and mean it. I knew we would wean eventually and so I wasn't worried about it.

I had attempted to limit his nursing to only at bedtime. So often though, that flew out the window. For the most part, we nursed before going to sleep, right when he woke up, and if he got hurt/pitched too big of a fit. Also, he was still a big, night time nurser. Many nights, he would nurse ALLLLLLLLL night long. He gets up on his own every single night and gets into our bed without us knowing. He also pulls my breast out all by himself and nurses. That was my hardest obstacle. I didn't even wake up to tell him, "no boo boos" because I slept so deeply. But, it was rough on my body to lay in the same position for 30 months and have someone suck at me for  4-5 hours straight each night!!!

I guess some of you are wondering how old Webb is and others of you are probably shaking your head in disbelief because you know how old he is and you think it is inappropriate, absurd, or wrong. That is totally fine. I am used to getting looks and opinions from those who don't exactly approve of the way I do things and I have learned to let that roll off my back. I have gained more and more confidence through having people judge me because I know I am truly doing things based on my instincts and on one else's. I don't go with the majority. I choose my own path for raising and I like that. That was my goal as a mother. To be a mom to my children. To listen to my gut. To go with what I know. To research what I wondered about and to form my own opinions  I have to say, not many like that. Perhaps they feel that I judge them for the way they do it (I can assure you, I don't. I know what that feels like.) or perhaps they question their own judgement and choices with their children. Either way, I can sleep at night and I know that I am doing what is best for our family and my children are growing, healthy, thriving, normal boys.

Oh, by the way, I realize I never answered the question. I got lost on a tangent. Forgive me ;-) Webb is 30 months old. That means, 2-1/2 years old.

A few months ago, I even wondered if I had any milk left or if I was just a paci. Surely to goodness I was dried up. I never got engorged anymore (probably because he didn't demand too much quantity and he still nursed fairly often). I checked in the shower one night and was shocked to see that I still had LOTS of milk. Women are amazing, aren't we!

Dane and Webb spent the night with my in-laws this past Friday night. Webb has spent the night one other time I think and it was at least a year ago, if not longer. I didn't know how he'd do because now that he is older, he seems almost more attached and he understands what you are saying. So, for instance, if you say, "mommy isn't here. You have to wait until morning." That could cause a HUGE, massive, meltdown. I was nervous and expected to be getting him in the middle of the night.

Lo and Behold, I woke up Saturday morning curled up in a comfortable position with my boob free! I couldn't believe he had made it. Then I was nervous about how rough their night was. My MIL told me it was easy. During the night when he cried, she would just say, "Remember, mommy is at her house. You will see mommy tomorrow so just snuggle up with me." And he would say, "Oh." When she told me that, I was shocked!!!! Nights are never that easy for me. LOL.

I joked with her and my FIL that I might just not ever give it to him again since he did so well. I was already engorged quite nicely and hurting and I was a bit fearful I might get mastitis since I am so prone to it.

The more the evening went on, the more I realized what a perfect opportunity to wean cold turkey (which is what I did with Dane). He had already been 24 hours without it and I had a big head start. I knew I had missed out on that "last nursing session" if I went ahead with it where I cherish the last time and to be honest, that still makes me feel emotional. I also knew he had to be weaned eventually and no time would be easier than another. Brent was at work, so I wouldn't have to worry about keeping him up with a screaming child all night long. It was looking like the perfect chance.

I started bedtime rituals around 7:30pm. I told Webb that we would not be getting boo boos because the milk was all gone and I had owie's on them (no lie. They were engorged and painful-- definitely lied about the no milk. I had an abundance of milk!!!). He was ok with it at first and I gave him some coconut milk in a sippy. I started out with him on the couch so Dane could go on and go to sleep in his bed. He wasn't having it. He threw the sippy and screamed, "I want boo boos!!!!!" I patiently told him they were all gone and he was a big boy now. He screamed, "I a baby!!!! MOOMMMMMYYYY!!! NOOOOOOO!" It was heartbreaking. I allowed Dane to the couch because I realized this was going to be a looooong bedtime routine. I put on a movie and Webb still cried and occasionally screamed. "I want mommy's milk!! MOMMY!!! PEAS!!! Mommy!!! NO! I want boo boos!!!" Snot, drool, and tears just flowed. He was so so so upset. I felt so torn. I wanted to nurse him so bad and I knew he would pass out immediately, but then I would have to start this whole process over again. I begged God to help him relax and go to sleep. He would quiet down and watch the movie and then start back up. It was heartwrenching. My mom was texting (from the hospital) saying, "you are mean", "just give it to him". I really appreciated her being on my side!!! LOL. Even at 9:30, Dad text me saying mom wanted to know if I had "fed Webb". Thanks for making it sound like I am starving him. LOL.

From 7:45pm-10:45pm, I fought him. We watched one movie and 2 Brady Bunch episodes. He finally fell asleep at 10:45, but when I laid him in his bed, he sat up saying, "No, mommy. Hold me." I was shocked he didn't say "boo boos" because that is usually what he says if he wakes up as I am laying him down. I was absolutely exhausted, so I just decided to pile both boys in my bed and attempt it from a sleeping position.

Once in my bed, Dane was asleep before I got laid down good and Webb played. He did not mention "boo boos" even ONE time. It's like he realized, "Ok. She is serious. I'm not getting them." He jumped, tossed, turned, and sang. I was nervous because my boobs were hurting and HUGE and I didn't want to fall asleep and him land on one of them. I kept saying, "Please lay down, Webb. Mommy is sleepy." Finally, around 11:20pm, he laid down next to me and just went to sleep. I could not believe it. I slept in a sports bra with an ice pack and then a t-shirt. I mainly layered myself so Webb couldn't have easy access, but then also, I was trying to contain my breasts and help with the engorgement. The next morning we had church and I didn't want to be in pain, MASSIVELY huge, or have mastitis.

Webb woke up only once during the night and did not mention the boo boos still. He just talked for a minute and curled back up. I was so happy it went smoothly because I was still practically dead!

The next morning, I text Brent to see if he would bring a head of cabbage home. Cabbage leaves are supposed to help with engorgement and drying up.

I was huge and hurting, but no mastitis.

My arms feel like they won't go down because I am engorged even on the sides under my armpit! If you touch the top of my chest, it is hard as a rock!

Webb usually wants boo boos immediately upon waking and when he woke up Sunday morning, he said, "I want eggs and bacon. I eat all gone."

Here is the cabbage leaves stuffed in my bra!

I was also nervous about nap time. Webb fell asleep on the way home from church. WHOO HOO!!! When he woke up from the nap, I was prepared for a battle.

Once again, no mention of the boo boos.

He just sat in my lap and snuggled while Brent heated up spaghetti for him.

I've always wanted for him to just sit in my lap. He never has though. If he was in my lap, then he was shouting for boo boos.

At bedtime last night, I started the process at 7pm to hopefully ensure we wouldn't be up till 11pm again! He played in the bed and talked (I lay with them because we don't "cry it out") and FINALLY, at 7:50pm, he laid down next to me and went to sleep. I came in the living room at 8am beaming. I could NOT believe it was this easy. Sure, it was a horrible, agonizing three hours of crying, but he was over it. HIP HIP HOORAY!!!!

He even still loves me and is happy :-)

He loves Rose. Drinking coconut milk and happy as ever.

As for Dane, he woke up coughing yesterday. You all know coughing (or any sickness for that matter) doesn't bother me and he had no fever and felt fine. I gave him some ALJ to help with the cough (BEST STUFF EVER!!!).

He was so excited about church and seeing Mrs. Paulette. He asks me every single day if we are going to church. I am thankful to be a part of a church that offers tons for my kids to keep them interested and desiring to be there!!!

I didn't even question whether or not to go to church. I honestly tend to forget how other parents are terrified of coughing, snot, sneezes, AKA- GERMS!!!!! I am not one of those moms and I need to be more mindful that I am in the minority there. I got some looks when Dane was coughing yesterday and I felt really bad!!!!

So, if you go to our church and are reading this now, accept this at my apology and know that I only keep my kids away from other kids if they have a fever (and some parents don't care if my kids are around with a fever, but I know who those parents are). 

Dane went to sleep last night at 7pm, which led me to believe he didn't feel so hot. He coughed during the night.

When we got up this morning, he had a slight fever, was coughing, sneezing, snotty, and said his head hurt. 

Oh great!

Now the parents at church will love me even more! LOL.

I gave him some more ALJ (stupid me only gave one dose yesterday and didn't "treat" him because I wasn't worried at all) and then made some cough medicine (which Dane HATES!!!!!!!)

1/4 teas cayenne pepper (we are out and Brent is picking up more after his meeting this morning)

1/4 teas ground ginger

1 Tbsp Raw Apple Cider Vinegar

2 Tbsp Water

1 Tbsp honey

It was like pulling teeth to get him to take it. I will make him take this at least one more time today, hopefully I can encourage 2 more times. Especially once the cayenne pepper makes it's way here.

Already, he has coughed maybe 2x time since 7:30am (it is 9am) and first thing this morning, he was hacking nonstop!! His fever is gone and he is asking for food. I love my homeopathic/home remedies!!!!!!

I do believe it is time for me to get my butt in gear. I haven't even made breakfast yet and we generally eat around 7am. 

Oh, by the way, I feel like my engorgement has gone down today. I will use cabbage leaves, heat, and ice off and on today and let you know if I develop any infections, which I am not expecting to.

Have a wonderful week!

Chill Saturday

Last night, my babies spend the night with Nana and Papa.

For the most part, everyone knows I still nurse Webb.

We are in the weaning process and by process I mean he refuses to give it up and I don't have the will power to make him. Also, it's not hurting anything and I guess a piece of me is hoping it will be easier one day. HA!

Dane and Webb got up at 5:55am Friday morning and wanted to get ready to go to Nana's house. I tried to explain that Nana was getting them after work. Webb went to the window many times during the day to look for Nana which I took as a good sign that he would stay the whole night and not flip out for the boo boos and one of us have to go over there in the middle of the night.

I secretly picked Brent as the middle of the night runner. I mean, seriously, he is a PRO at that and I am not.

Well, they went and I woke up this morning in my bed and Webb wasn't in it. That is a first. LOL.

Last night, Brent and I enjoyed a very low key and cheap date. I planned on cooking turkey burgers, sweet potato fries, and salad. But, we had a gift card and Brent wanted PIZZA!!!! Come on! I was doing something healthy. I obliged though (I'm not one to turn down pizza) and he decided on the way we would have to get a Coke to go with it (If you know me, you know even my children refer to coke as "Bad stuff"). I never ever ever drink coke and Brent... well, he has to answer for his own health! I obliged again as long as we got Root Beer ;-)

We stopped at Ingles because I am cheap and told him I didn't want to pay for a Coke at the pizza place. While in there, Brent saw donuts (I had bought lemon greek yogurt for dessert) and demanded we get some for dessert (Ok. Ok. Ok. Maybe he suggested it and didn't demand it). I was picking out my ONE when Brent said to get THREE a piece. I just looked at him and busted out laughing. I didn't want him to be mad at me, so I reluctantly picked THREE ;-)

We check out and head to get our pizza and hot wings. Oh, did I forget to mention Brent said we couldn't have pizza without hot wings. Yeah, this date just keeps getting healthier and healthier.

It was fun though. We came home and ate waaaaaaay too much garbage and watched some super long movie.

I got up at 5:30am and fixed his breakfast, emptied the dishwasher, picked up the kitchen, sent him off to work, and took myself back to bed (which I never do!). I slept until 8am. Whoo hoo!

I was almost dreading my alone day. I honestly cannot tell you the last time I was alone. Completely alone with no husband or kids. Yeah, I'm alone when I go to work or sometimes when I workout... but never by myself... to just be at home with no plans. I felt guilty actually.

So, last night I made a list of things I needed to do so I wouldn't feel so guilty.

When I got up at 8, I got my coffee and sat on the couch to review Hebrews and begin studying Galatians. I took my precious time and wasn't nursing a toddler or hearing the Brady Bunch in the background. It was nice and I was able to really comprehend what I was reading.

I got ready after that and went to the gym. I met my sister-in-law there and we took step and flow (a yoga type class). Two straight hours at the gym and no guilt! After that, I went to the station. Brent and I sat and talked for over an hour. Even last night, we didn't talk. We just stuffed our face and watched a movie. It was soooooo nice. So nice. Just to talk with no interruptions. I needed that also.

I came home because I was starving. I cooked, looked over some doula info, cleaned up, and cleaned my entire house top to bottom.

I got recipes ready for our church cookbook after that, surfed the web, and now I am blogging. My house is spotless and super quiet. Maybe too quiet.

I am not used to this.

To the quiet.

To the emptiness.

I can see how beneficial days like this could be though. Especially as a homeschool mom. I actually would go so far as to say I was NEEDING today. For 2 months, I was a single mommy unpacking a house. Now, Brent is home much more often, but he is tired and has a hard time catching up on sleep. I still feel like a single mom many days. I rarely don't have them at my feet and when I do, I'm still engaging in something. My mind or my body is still working.

I think I was wore out. I feel rejuvenated, refreshed, rested, and ready for the week ahead with the kids.

Let me finish by saying this:

What on earth did I do before my babies? I would never ever ever, not in a million drillion years choose to go back to life with no kids. They are amazing and I am so thankful for their little lives and what they teach me everyday.

Hope you are having a chill Saturday also :-)

A Day in Pictures

Good Afternoon, all!

The house smells of fresh baked bread, Parmesan tilapia, sweet potatoes, and green beans cooking.

It sounds like 2 loud little boys who play sweetly together one minute and then both start yelling the next. The imaginative things I hear coming from their bedroom make my heart swell and my lips smile. I did just hear Dane snap, "Don't hit, Webb! That's a naughty thing to do" and had to laugh a little bit a my boss.

From the other room, I remind them often that daddy is sleeping and to please try to keep it down.

I thought today would be a lovely day to not blog and instead, let my pictures do the talking-- with fine print beneath each. That is since I only have approximately 12 minutes until my dinner timer goes off ;-)

I see this every morning on my mantle and love the reminder that regardless of our circumstances or how other people may treat us, JOY is a choice. It is a reminder to be joyful.

Dane did some school early this morning since we bypassed the gym this morning. We are trying to be intentional about all gas usage and I think that may mean less gym time, more working out at home.

I snapped this picture right after I tripped over these shoes and just before I reminded the boys that their shoes do not go in my kitchen floor.

 Dane spanking the bread dough ;-) I made another loaf today- one I found online and costs around $0.50 a loaf. The boys love to help.

Dane made sure to show Webb the correct way to spank the dough.

Hard work sure does pay off! I cut about 14 slices (rather large) so I believe this will be our new bread!

We loaded up and drove about 5 minutes away to Bartow Beach today since Daddy was home. It was cold, but it was fun!

The boys enjoyed throwing rocks in the water, hiking through the woods, and playing with sticks.

Dane snapped this before I could really smile so I only look partially happy. LOL. Ladies, I know... I know... I am a lucky woman to score such a HOT husband.

I love seeing my husband be a daddy! It's funny I say that because in all honesty, that is pretty much all I have ever known him as ;-)

Little things that make me feel all warm and fuzzy.

Grateful for the hour we got to play outside :-) Vitamin D does us GOOD!

Little angel baby.

My timer is buzzing and my stomach is growling as I smell the delicious smells coming to me from the kitchen!!!

Gotta run and eat me some food.

See ya later :-)

Ouch

Gosh.

Don't you just hate it when the preacher preaches something and your face feels hot the entire time, or you feel as though you cannot swallow past the guilt lump in your throat.

I know I do.

Ouch. It actually, physically hurts. But can be so beneficial.

Good thing about it, it is eye opening and such an amazing opportunity to take what you have heard/that you are guilty of and make it right.

Well, I didn't get preached at last night. Nope. I was just laying with my boys like I do every night to get them to sleep and I ran across this article. PLEASE, momma's, stop right now and take the time to read this.

I laid there trying to deny it was me, but.... I had the same feelings that I get when I just know the preacher is preaching to me.

My heart started swelling and beating faster. I started sweating. My face turned red. I felt as though I could not swallow past the lump in my throat.

Was I missing my boy's childhood???

The answer was hard to take in and it's even harder to admit to you guys.

YES!

I am :'-(

I was guilty of not 1, not 2, not even 3 of the list it gave, but almost every single one. I felt like such a failure.

Each night, I lay in the bed with the boys after we read and I nurse Webb. I lay in there until both boys are asleep though and I ALWAYS play on my phone. I use it to stay awake in all honesty and also because I am addicted to it!

I catch up on FB, on blogs, on things I was wanting to research throughout the day, on email, on my HayDay Farm, etc.

I do get irritated with the boys when they take longer than an hour to fall asleep. Last night, Webb fell asleep quickly, but Dane kept tossing and turning. I had lots to do when I got up and I felt my aggravation growing. I kept snapping, "Lay down, Dane!" "Do you want me to get up?" "Quit bouncing up and down or you will wake Webb up!" Then I would look back at my phone.

After I finished reading this article, I felt HORRIBLE!!! I glanced over at my big boy (Webb was in between us) and he was curled up on his side looking at me with a sort of longing.

I could have wept right there. I stood up and walked around to where he was. I laid my phone on the other side of the bed, face down. I snuggled up to him as close as I could get. His entire body relaxed against mine. He smiled and hugged me.

My heart broke into a million pieces.

Why would I trade this each evening for my PHONE?!?!?!? WHO CARES IF I FALL ASLEEP!!!???

I whispered in his ear, "Dane, tell mommy to put her phone down sometimes." He didn't say anything and I just started crying. I said, "I love you more than I love my phone. Don't you ever forget that. I'm sorry that I don't act that way."

He turned to me and just wrapped his little arms around me as tight as they would go.

He was so happy.

He then whispered back to me, "I'm not sleepy. Can we get up and watch cartoons?" I had so much I needed to do, but I said, "Yes!"

We got up and snuggled on the couch. Even daddy came in there with us.

I made popcorn and we all snuggled and watched a movie.

During the movie, I left my phone in the kitchen.

You may remember I told you I played on my farm at night, Hay Day. Dane loves it and I limit what he can do because I have earned points and I work towards goal, etc. (I know! I know! It sounds SO stupid and silly! But it really is addicting.) While we were snuggled on the couch last night I told Dane that Hay Day was now only his and I wouldn't be playing it anymore. He said, "You mean I can do anything I want on the farm?" I told him yes and he said, "YES!!! I don't ever have to ask you again!"

It's all yours Dane!

I am making a promise, a vow if you will, to myself and to all of my readers---

I am going to NOT miss my boys' childhood.

They are WAY more important to me than some dumb phone, fb, my blog, my email, or stupid apps!

I do not ever want them to feel like I treasure my electronic device more than I do them, what they are saying ,or what they want to engage me in.

I am vowing to leave my phone away from me (or keep it with me when I am on call for a client, but to not be actively on it) and to not check on certain things ALLLLLL day long. The same way I limit my children's screen time, I will be limiting mine.

I want to be an intentional mom. I want to play with them. Read with them. Teach them. Talk to them. Cherish them. In 20 years, I don't want to have a better relationship with my phone, than I do them!

So, thanks mom, for posting that article. Even though it hurt to read and hurt even more to admit I was that mom, I desperately needed to read those words. I am vowing to start doing things differently from this day forward!

-Side note-- Webb is asleep and I allowed Dane some screen time before we read ;-) I haven't already broken my vow!

They are precious, aren't they!

POPCORN AT OUR HOUSE:

I keep the kernels in this nice glass jar. I love glass and I love the look of popcorn, so it is part of my kitchen "decor".

 We keep 1/4 cup measuring cup in there and you put one scoop in a brown paper bag. Roll the top up one or two times and microwave it like you would any popcorn.

When it is finished, while it is still in the bag, I add coconut oil and sea salt and shake it around a good bit.

How much coconut oil? A big dollop!

You cannot go wrong with coconut oil! SOOOOO many wonderful health benefits including helping to lose fat!

There is my big boy, anxiously waiting on his popcorn for a late movie!

Happy Tears

If you got on Facebook Friday, you saw our WONDERFUL news!

My husband got hired on full-time for Bartow County EMS.

The only bad news, he will start making in a month what he WAS making TWO WEEKS!

It will definitely take some adjusting and really sticking to a budget. We know, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that this is God's will. We know---we believe, we have watched Him provide on less---that we are going to be just fine.

Contentment.

Ouch. That is a tough word. There is so much I want. So much I would love to go out and buy for our house, for others, for my kids, for my hubby, for me.

One of my new year goals is to find joy in the simplicity of life. To practice contentment. To be ok with what we have without always longing for more. To not look at my neighbor and think, "Awww, man. I wish I had that" or "I wish we had the money for this". Do you think God read my blog? Maybe my heart. I do believe He is going to make it a priority for me to find contentment in what we have. We have no choice ;-) It was fitting to sit down this morning and read these passages that were in my Bible study:

⁵ Let your conversation be without covetousness; and be content with such things as ye have: for he hath said, I will never leave thee, nor forsake thee.⁶ So that we may boldly say, The Lord is my helper, and I will not fear what man shall do unto me.Hebrews 13:5-6 KJV

The version that goes along with my Bible study says this:

⁵ Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have, because God has said, “Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.”
⁶ So we say with confidence,“The Lord is my helper; I will not be afraid. What can mere mortals do to me?”

I definitely think it was fitting for this reminder today. God is good to know what I need, when I need it!

So, what is the GOOD news about Brent's full-time position.

First of all, he is home way more and we know what to expect week to week. He works 24 on and has 48 off. His short week, he will work 2 days, his long week, he will work 3 days. On average, he will work 10 days a month. He was working 5-6 days a week and 100+ hours a week. I was a single mom and we missed him so much more than you can imagine!

Not only that, but he just started online school last Monday and he starts the paramedic program in May (he will have to attend classes then). He had to have a schedule so he knew he could get his school work finished and then eventually, go to school 2-3 days a week and do clinicals for 1 day. 

Also, he has a part-time position lined up at Hamilton. He was unable to make that happen because of his long hours here in Bartow. He was not willing to sacrifice this job (his dream job) for Hamilton and he knew that he didn't need to ever turn down a call for work (that is how part-time works and how he got so many hours. It's as needed, so anyone who calls out, that shift needs to be filled.) in order to have a better shot at full-time.

Full-time also means benefits and a pension plan :-) HOORAY!!! 

The absolute BEST reason (IMO) for him being hired full-time, is is 100%, without a doubt, CLEARLY God's will. He was told it would be a least a year (BTW, when he went to the courthouse to sign his full-time papers, the lady couldn't believe she was seeing him again. She said it is generally 2 years before a part-timers gets full-time!!! It was 2 months for Brent) before he went full-time. There were/are 3 other part-timers who have been there longer than Brent (he got hired in November of 2012) who would be in line for any open full-time position first. They had no idea when a full-time position would even be opened though. So, 3 full-time positions would have to open BEFORE he would be considered for full-time. We knew he had to have a full-time position though. So, we began praying that God's will would prevail. That He would open a door no man could shut. We asked family, friends, our church, and my Bible study group to pray with us. We fervently prayed and asked God that He would make His will for Brent evident. If this wasn't where He wanted Brent, then no full-time position (because he would be forced to find a full-time spot elsewhere). 

In early December, Brent got word that someone had been fired and they would be filling the position in January. We began begging God that this would work out. Brent worked tirelessly, proving himself and his work ethic, for the entire month of December. We still knew it was unlikely he would be hired because of the 3 others "ahead" of him.

Friday, Brent got called in and was asked to come an hour earlier than the shift started. We were super hopeful. I prayed fervently on the way to the gym and then throughout class. I checked my phone numerous times and then I saw the text that said, "I GOT IT!! IT'S MINE!!! I START ASAP!" I held off on the tears until we were home and then it hit me. God did this! This is why God brought us here. That is when I broke down, thanking and praising GOD, through whom all blessings flow. HE opened a door no man could shut. GOD PROVIDED THIS JOB FOR BRENT!

That is why we are ecstatic and truly believe this is God's will for Brent. It feels SO awesome to know your husband, the head of your home, is in line with God's will. How can I worry about money? Clearly, God will provide.

Still speaking of my hubby, he made me cry myself to sleep last night.

If you know my husband, you know he is not very wordy, emotional, or lovey dovey. I am all of those things and sometimes, I crave for him to be that way towards me. It is just not him. I don't take it offensively, I just realize, that is completely out of character for him. That does't mean that I still wouldn't love for him to be that way occasionally ;-)

He was at work last week and sent me a link to this song and said, "Listen to this. This is our song." 

I immediately sent back, "This better be serious and not stupid."

He told me to just listen to it. The song was titled, "Overwhelmed". I figured it was some corny song about how I overwhelm him with my goofy, nagging, wifey-ways. So, I prepared myself to laugh.

I listened to it and waited on the silly lines. Instead, it was the sweetest song in the world. I cried the whole way through then text and said, "I hope you meant that because I am crying." He said, "I really did. It describes perfectly how I feel. I love this song and I love you!"

So, I started crying even more. 

Yesterday, he bought it off iTunes and started playing it and came up and hugged me and said, "I love you." It was sweet and I started loving him (and the song) even more to know he really did mean it. 

Last night as I was drifting off to sleep, he put it on again and I smiled and told him the entire story of when he text me and what went through my mind, etc. I told him, "I cried because all of the sudden, I knew how much you loved me." He then told me the sweetest things about how he couldn't believe it took a song to make me feel loved and how special I was to him and how much he loved me. 

I fell asleep crying and feeling SOOOOO loved. That is NOT my husband. He does not verbalize things like that. If he says it, he means it. He does not say mushy gushy things, EVER!!!! Like he has said before, "I told you I love you last week, why do I need to tell you this week?" And he is serious! LOL. He made me feel so unbelievably loved and cherished. 

I don't know what I shared all of that. I guess because it meant so much to me!

Well, I guess it is time for me to get my butt in gear. I woke up with a headache, so I bypassed the gym and decided to workout here since our gym is finally cleaned out and organized and here I am still in my jammies!

I also am going to work on this homeschool day planner I found on a new blog. Check it out. 

I am looking forward to filling it all out :-)

Ya'll have a wonderful week!

Baking Bread and Preschool

It's no ordinary day in our house today.

DADDY IS HOME!!!!!

Brent has been gone for 3 straight days and he was home when we got home from the gym/grocery shopping this morning. The boys were so excited to see him. He laid on the bed and they played together for awhile before his eyes could no longer handle it.

This is what was in my dreams when I was a little girl!

The boys are now playing together and playing well together. That actually just happened recently- the playing well together part. I love to see them interact, communicate, and imaginate (I know, I know. I made that word up.) together. It warms my heart.

Right before I sat down to blog, a naked Webb came to me and said, "I pee in the hunting club, mom." Dane's hunting club, that Santa brought, stays in our living room (When you are a mom, you decorate with interesting decor) and Webb had gone in there and peed in the floor! Life is anything but boring when you have 2 boys in the house!

Hopefully nudity doesn't offend you. If it does,  don't ever just "drop by" our house.

Here he is telling me. He was unbelievably proud of himself.

I get asked so often if Dane is in preschool. No. He is not. He is 4 years old and my personal opinion is that he should be a 4 year old-- playing at home with his mommy and brother. He has the rest of his life for school. This is my very own personal opinion. If you send your 4 year old to preschool, I do not judge you or think you are a bad mom. So, what does Dane do all day?

 He goes to preschool. He plays, learns, cooks, picks up his toys, play games, sings songs, explores outside, practices using his imagination, learns new words, reads books, we teach basic skills-- like using your inside voice (still working on this one!), sharing, listening, sitting still and paying attention, counting, following instructions, and being kind to name a few. He is at home with me, under my supervision, and learning what I want him to learn. I also instill Bible principles, we restudy Bible lessons from church and Bible study, read the Bible, practice memory verses, and see songs to Jesus. Those are pretty much the only differences.

We sat down yesterday to do some school. It is very low key here, because I feel like he is learning constantly, so sitting down with a workbook page (at age 4) is rare. We did yesterday though and I only had the intention of doing 2 pages before going outside to play. Dane would not stop though. We ended up doing 8 pages before I declared it outside time. I was in need of some sunshine and I knew they had some energy built up. Dane explored with his magnifying glass and Webb played with his big choo choo Santa brought.

 We also climbed trees, rode bikes, looked for worms, and ran around. I personally love having them home to share in all these things with.

I am going back to Dave Ramsey's plan of envelope system. I want to get us out of debt that we got during unemployment, plus be smart with every single penny that is coming in. Right now we have just been flying by the seat of our pants. We have no idea where our money goes each month and we spend it on insane things. I am ready to take control and know where it is going. The grocery budget is what I am focusing on right now. I want to put every extra cent towards debt, so as I look at what we buy (we buy a LOT of food-- feeding boys and a woman that is not afraid to eat requires LOTS of food). Obviously, I cannot not buy food. I just want to be smart with what I am buying. I want to get the most bang for my buck. We haven't bought "organic" since unemployment. Things were just incredibly tight for us and that was an area we cut back on. We bought a few organic items, but mainly, we didn't. We are still not to that point yet. I don't feel like I can breathe with the weight of debt on my shoulders. Therefore, we will cut back as much as possible to get that taken care of. Organic is practically double, so that won't work right now. Plus, I want to save for my van to get fixed!

I buy good bread from Costco and we eat LOTS and LOTS of bread. It is fairly cheap ($4.50 for 2 loaves and it is good, wholesome ingredients). I spend about $20-$30 on bread a MONTH. I wasn't lying when I said we eat a lot. I decided, that is an area I can save on. So, I am back to making my bread. I started today actually.

The worst thing about making homemade bread is we almost eat the entire loaf when it comes out of the oven. It is sooooo much better than store bought. It's all warm and fresh and we cannot stop picking at it. I have got to find me some raw milk in this area. I want to start making my own butter again too because homemade bread and homemade butter has to be what heaven tastes like. OMG. SOOOOOOOO divine!!!!!

I am trying a new recipe with the bread. It is supposed to be a "copy cat" recipe to Great Harvest Bread Company. Super easy and super cheap. I haven't sat down to figure up total costs for a loaf, but I would venture to say, $1.50 a loaf or so.

I sat down to blog to get out of doing what I need to do:

I could tackle this laundry that needs to be folded. (Or I could even paint that section of white wall next to the fireplace that Brent had to fix.)

 I could clean out my sink-- that police car got sprayed with Webb's pee and is drying after its bath. The lunch box needs to be washed out. The ground turkey is for dinner tonight-- I'm thinking homemade chili- and I really could let it be simmering. The large turkey is for dinner tomorrow night/turkey meat for sandwiches.

Or I could even paint this door my husband hung up for me Friday and the trim that goes with it. BUT.. I think I'll wait till he finishes the base boards.

Seriously, there is more I could be doing (like playing with my boys or reading to them), so I guess while my hubby is sleeping, I'll go get those things done so we can hang out when he wakes up.

I hope you all have a happy Tuesday. Please be praying for our family. We have a serious prayer request concerning my mom. I will share more in a later update.

Want To Be A Part Of God Working?

I heard a sermon on the way home from Ringgold last night that was talking about prayer. AWESOME sermon by the way.

The gist of it was: when you pray, you are not playing a game where you might change God's mind and you might now depending on how well you do. Nope. The decision is already made in His mind. His plan will happen just like He wants it to. BUT... when you pray, you give God the opportunity to prove Himself, His magnificence, His omnipotence  and His righteous to you. You get to be a part of it. You get to see His hand. You get to see His power. You get to see His glory.

And what happens after that--- You PRAISE God. You give Him glory. You tell others how great and mighty and wonderful He is.

Those that don't pray... or those that don't pray to a Sovereign, Almighty, King of Kings, Lord of Lords, the One and Only, TRUE God don't necessarily have bad things happen to them or never experience good. No, God is still gracious and He provides, they just miss out on being a part of God's work.

We have seen God at work A LOT here lately. Especially back in August. We were on our knees begging God for direction, so when that door opened up, the only "person" we were praising was God Himself. We were thanking and praising Him for answering our prayer and opening up a door and also shutting another door. We watched God provide through the year of unemployment, through school, moving, finding a church, finding a home, Brent getting hired (not one, but two places), Brent going back to school, and much more with much more that we are praying for that we hope to see answered within a few days or weeks.

Now, we find ourselves in yet another pickle.

I'll back up.

We took a Dave Ramsey class in 2010 at our church and we were working to Live Like No One Else, So Later, We Could Live Like No One Else. We had checked many things off our list to do that. We were working on saving 6 months of expenses in case something terrible happened. Something like your husband losing his job he has been with for 10 years, just 2 days after he turned 30.

Oh wait, that happened, didn't it?

That nice savings account we had built up.... s...l...o...w...l...y... diminished. Which was part of the reason we hit our knees begging God, "What now???" back in August. God was so good though. He allowed us to live for a year with our savings and the exact month He told us to move, was the exact month Brent finished school and we had nothing "holding" us there.

After we moved here, He continued to provide for us, many times with us not knowing how He did it! The day we were moving into our house, I felt my transmission in my van slip. I tried not to worry about it, but it started doing it more and more. Eventually, we realized we were going to HAVE to get it fixed. We aren't exactly in the position to pay $3,500-$4,500 (quotes we received) to have it fixed so we parked it while we decided to start praying about what God wants us to do. My mother-in-law was super kind and said I could drive her car, she calls it the Pimp Mobile and we have affectionately begun calling it that as well, why we are in limbo about what to do.

You know you are jealous!

I am so grateful to have a vehicle to drive!!!! Praise the Lord that He already had this one figured out too and that my MIL was kind enough to loan us her car during this time. My FIL still cannot drive after his accident, so my MIL is driving his truck.

Now, here we are.... I'm sure my MIL would love to have her car back in the year 2013 ;-) We are absolutely not willing to get a car payment right now... it goes against our belief and it would not be smart since Brent starts back to school for 18mnts next week. His hours will be cut down and we don't want to feel pressure. SO our options are pretty much-- selling my van and buying something with that money or saving to have the transmission worked on. 

-Side note: my van is worth just a little bit more than getting the transmission worked on.

All of that very long story to ask you if you would please pray with us that God's will will be evident to us. I believe if it's important to me, it's important to God and this is pretty important to me! I am giving YOU the chance to be a part of GOD working!!! See, when I post the answered prayer, you will be excited because you will have invested time in praying for this! :-)

I really do appreciate it!!! Thank you :-)

Letters To My Boys

I thought I would share something personal with you guys today.

Ever since I was pregnant with Dane, I would write letters to him. After he was born, I carried on the tradition. Every few months, I sit down and write a letter to Dane and Webb, documenting my feelings and love towards them at that time and some special things from that age.

I am hoping that one day, my sons can look back from the time they were born to the present time and get a better understanding of my love for them. If they ever doubt my love, they should have countless love letters from me to them. I hope and pray these will be things they cherish and hold dear. Not to sound depressing, but if something horrible should ever happen to me, my kids can still grow up knowing how much I loved them.

I am starting to take my handwritten letters and type them up and save them on the computer. I decided during that process, that some other moms out there might enjoy doing this for their children and that is what led me to share this on my blog.

I will share two letters per child. The first one will be the most recent letter after their birth and the second one will be the most recent letter I have done for them.

Thanks for stopping by and I hope that as readers, you too, get a better understanding of my deep love for my children.

            June 18, 2008

Dane,

You are 13 days old and I am so in love with you. Everything about you is just so perfect. I sit and stare at you for hours at a time. Your little hands and feet, your growing belly, your adorable lips, and soft velvet hair. It is all so amazing to me! I am so thankful for you and I am so glad we had you. Even though you were not planned, you WERE NOT an accident. I don’t ever want you to think that. You are a miracle and a dream come true. I have wanted to be a mommy my entire life and you made that desire happen for me. You are so special.

Mommy labored for 32 long hours to bring you into the world and it was so worth it. I’d do it all again in a heartbeat. It was the best day of my entire life and by far, the most exciting day. Towards the end of my labor, when I was pushing, they lost your heartbeat because you were under my pubic bone. They didn’t know if that was the case or not. Luckily, I was unaware of any of that… I was too intent on getting you out. However, your daddy, your Gammie, and the midwives were aware of it and frightened. After you were born and placed on my chest, I looked up at your daddy and he was crying. Dane, your daddy didn’t think you were alive and he was so scared. He asked if you were ok and the midwives assured him they could feel your heartbeat and they had him feel also. That is something that once I found out, I will never forget. All of your cooing and fussing are such precious sounds to me, even your occasional crying is music to my ears. I am thankful for your health, heartbeat, and noises. God is so good and I thank Him every day for you! I promise to do my best as a mommy. I know I will make mistakes, but just know I am trying my best. We will slowly learn this thing together. I love you so much and so does your daddy. He amazes me with you. Dane, your daddy is so in love with you. I love watching him with you and listening to the sweet things he whispers to you. You are the light of his life and the 2 of you are going to have lots and lots of fun together through the years. Mommy and daddy love each other too. No matter what happens in life, remember that. Your daddy is the love of my life. We have so much fun together and God is working on our relationship, making it stronger and making us stronger together—you are helping us also.

Psalm 127:3 says, “Children are a gift from the Lord. Babies are a reward.” Dane if there is anything I want for you in life it is for you to give your life to the Lord. I pray that as your grow I do a good job of teaching you about Jesus and educating you on the Bible. Jesus died for you, Dane.

Accept Him as your personal Savior at a young age and grow up loving Him and serving Him. He will direct all your paths and He is the only person who will never let you down. I love you more than you’ll ever know. Don’t grow up too fast… Mommy loves holding you and you won’t let me much longer.

Love,

Mommy

September 7, 2010

Webb,

Welcome to the world, Webb! You are 6 days old and I am so completely in love with you. I remember my labor and your birth so vividly and I find myself thinking back to it numerous times in the day. Your birth was so beautiful, so peaceful, and so perfect. The labor was short and I well rested and well prepared. I remember so well pushing you out. In the middle of my pushing I reached down and felt your little head. Excitement pulsed through me because I knew I was SO close to meeting my sweet baby. When daddy caught you and placed you on my chest, pure raw love overflowed from me. My precious baby BOY was finally here, healthy and beautiful. I was so thankful for you, praising God that it went smoothly, you were here, and you were perfect. I looked down into your sweet face and couldn’t understand how it was possible to love you with the same amount and same type of love as I have for your big brother. How it works, I’ll never understand. You are a wonderful baby with an exceptional big brother. I cannot wait to watch the two of you grow up together.

Each day, I look into your beautiful face and I thank God for you. You are a miracle and a dream come true. I love your every feature, your downy skin, your bony legs, arms, and bum bum. I love your long feet, toes, hands, and fingers. I love your little grunts and coos. I love your eyes- even the one with the little blood shot dot. I love how you look like Dane. I love how good you sleep and nurse. I could go on and on. I could also sit and hold you all day and sometimes, I do.

I cannot wait to see what your personality is like, what your talents and hobbies will be. I can’t wait to hear you pray to God like your big brother. I can’t wait to see all the opportunities that will come your way and what you will do with them. But then again, I want to freeze the hands of time and keep you right where you are.

I prayed for you daily while I was pregnant and now that you are here, I continue to cover you in prayer. I pray for many many things concerning you, your life, and your safety. One of my biggest and deepest prayers is that I do a good job of teaching you about God, His Son, Jesus, and the gift of salvation He presents to all. My prayer, Webb, is that you will learn to trust and love Jesus at a young age and that early in life, you will give your heart to Him so you have a security of a home in Heaven.

My sweet boy, the day you were born, I said a prayer, thanking God for the gift of you. You are ultimately His and He has loaned you to me. I know He loves you far greater than I can fathom. I trust Him with you and I know that He will always take care of you.

I am so excited to be your mommy. I look forward to watching you grow and seeing all your wonderful milestones. Don’t grow up too fast though, my precious Webb.

All My Love,
Mommy

January 1, 2013

Dane,

We are starting a new year and you have reminded me many times that this year, you will turn 5. Really? How did we get to 5 this quickly? It just can’t be so. You, my sweet boy, made my dream of becoming a mother real and I love you for it. You are the most special, precious 4 year old I know and I love you with all my heart.

I am amazed at how fast you have grown. You are officially big in my book. You dress yourself, get snacks by yourself, bathe yourself, brush your own teeth, buckle your own carseat, cut your own food with a knife, and so much more. I stand back and watch you sometimes with a bittersweet feeling coursing through me. I am so proud of you and this is what every mother dreams of--- a healthy child who develops at the right time and can do what they are supposed to do, yet, at the same time, it feels like yesterday that I found out I was expecting you. The fear I felt when I heard the news is still so real. I wasn’t cut out to be a mother?!?! Yet, I had always dreamed of being a mom. The moment I laid eyes on you, God humbled me as I realized God had entrusted you to me, and you deserved SO much better than me. I have spent every day since then trying my best to become all you (and Webb) deserve. I fail daily, but I have found, you and Webb are quick to forgive when I come to you and apologize.

You are into camo right now. You wear camo underwear, camo socks, camo pants, camo belt, camo shirt, camo jacket, camo toboggan, and camo boots. Each and every day, it is the same attire. It really is humorous to me. On Sundays, I let you wear camo pants and camo boots, but I make you wear a nice button down shirt. We are good at compromising after 4 years of working together. For Christmas, you asked for hunting thing and hunting clothes. I never expected my 4 year old to ask for more clothes than he did toys! LOL.

I love to watch you and Webb when you don’t realize I am. You are so sweet with him and like to help him understand things. You also like to pester the crap out of him, but I’m pretty sure that comes with the territory of brothers (or siblings in general). I spanked Webb this afternoon for disobeying and you walked up behind me and spanked me with an angry look on your face. I had to turn so you wouldn’t see the pride on my face. I was proud. That is what you are supposed to do—look out for your little brother, however, spanking me is unacceptable! LOL.

This past week, we were snuggled up on the couch. I said, “Dane, me and you should talk about our day”, then I asked what your favorite part of the day was. You said, “Hmmmmm” and looked away for a long time. Then you turned to me and said, “Right now. Right here, with you, mom.” You melted my heart. I never want to forget that.

You now have responsibilities in the house and you take them very seriously. I am so proud of the sweet, loving boy you are. I will thank God all of my days for interrupting my life and blessing me with YOU!

As we start a new year, I am praying for God to keep a hedge of protection around you. Not just physically, but also mentally. This is a crazy world we live in and it is getting crazier by the day. My prayer is that daddy and I do the right job sheltering you from what you need to be sheltered from and exposing you to what you need to be exposed to. I pray that you stay innocent as long as possible. I pray that you continue to have a heart for others, especially your brother. I pray that your love for Jesus grows. More than anything, I pray that you grasp what Jesus Christ did for you and you believe with all your heart that He died for you. I pray that you repent of your sins and ask Him into your heart at an early age.

I love you, my precious angel boy and I am so glad I am your mommy. Always remember, my favorite part of every day is when I am with you.

Mommy

November 8, 2012

Dear Webb,

You are 2 years old now and what a joy you are to this family. We have discovered you LOVE to make people laugh. If you get a laugh from someone, you will keep doing whatever made them laugh over and over. You make us laugh all the time. Many, many times, when I am getting onto you, I cannot because you make me laugh. Anytime I reprimand you, you laugh at me. You are just so cute, I can’t help but laugh! You are so silly, sweet, and loving. You love Dane more than anyone in this world! You do anything he asks of you without a fight (most of the time!). I spend many days wondering what we would do without you in our family, which means I spend many days thanking God for blessing us with you. You and Dane are best buds. I LOVE to watch the two of you together. I get tears as I see you out in the yard, playing together without a care in the world. I utter quick prayers like, “Lord, let them be close always. Help them love one another. Don’t let years make them distant, allow the years to make them closer” and more.

We are living at Nana and Papa’s house as we renovate our new house, Pappy’s old house. Today, I came out of the bathroom and you were on a toy four-wheeler (made for toys but you ALWAYS sit on it and roll around. LOL) on the first step of Nana’s 2^nd level. You were at a downward slope headed down the stairs on this. I caught you just in time and when I caught you, you said, “Watch mommy! COOL!!!!” You have no fear!!! I especially get glimpses of your fearlessness if you see Dane do something brave OR if Dane tells you to do something brave. You won’t even think twice before you attempt whatever that is. You watched Dane slide down a slide backwards and upside down ONE time before you went up and did the same thing!

You love trains (or “choo choo trains” as you call them). You love books, clothes, toys, railroad tracks, and more. You are constantly spotting choo choo trains and screaming out, “CHOO CHOO, MOMMA!!!” Dane never liked choo choos so this is new for us. You genuinely love them though.

We were at the Library yesterday and it was quiet except for the soft voice of the story teller. Outside we heard an ambulance drive by. You shrieked at the top of your lungs, “DADDY!!!! MOMMY!!! DADDY DRIVE THAT!!!! DADDY DRIVE THAT ‘AMBANCE’!!!!” It was so cute. Anytime we see ambulances or fire trucks or hear them, you go crazy screaming that daddy rides that.

My prayer for you sweet boy is that you understand at an early age about Jesus and what He did for you. I pray that mommy and daddy do a good job of raising you and teaching you about our King. I pray you have a childlike faith and grasp your need for a Savior at a young age.

We love you so much, Webb and we thank God for placing you in our family at just the right time. I cannot wait to see more of your personality emerge through the years and watch you and Dane grow closer and closer. You are super special to all of us. I love you, Webb Webb.

Mommy