Lessons

I had the privilege tonight to re-learn a lesson as well as give a lesson. The boys and I were grocery shopping at Walmart and it was crazy in there. People were everywhere and Dane insisted on having that annoying huge big gray buggy that comfortably fits both boys and is impossible to maneuver a thrill to get around corners. Webb was so tired and after about 10 minutes of shopping, only wanted to be held. Poor little guy. I just couldn't say no. I ended up struggling to get that buggy through the store while holding Webb (who was flinging himself in the position to nurse the whole time). Brent was volunteer firefighting at the Heritage High School football game or else he would have been in on the fun.

Anyways, I was looking at Sargento shredded cheeses and trying to determine which one would be the yummiest on my homemade pizza. I could hear Dane saying, "Moooooooom. Mooooooommmmy. Moooooooommmmma. Look!!!" I finally turned around after I found my cheese of choice and said, "Look at what?" He was pointing at a lady and said, "When her turns around, look at her face." I glanced up at the lady and could see, even from her bent position, that she wasn't a very pretty person. She looked angry and like she would be snapping on the next person who said, "Excuse me" in the crowded store. My heart instantly broke for her. I was embarrassed by what Dane said and how he was pointing. The thing about 3 year old's (I'm learning more and more everyday) is they say and do whatever comes into their minds--- even if it makes their mommy's want to dig and hole and hide from the whole wide world. It is our job as parents, to teach them what is acceptable and kind. He has never pointed at anyone and exclaimed something like that. I moved the buggy really quick and squatted down to where we were eye level. I said, "Dane, that is very ugly to point at someone and say something not nice like that. It is not how mommy or Jesus wants you to treat others. Jesus made that lady and He made her exactly how he wanted her to look. In Jesus' eyes, she is perfect. We don't need to make fun of what God has made. It not only will hurt that person's feelings, but it will hurt Jesus' feelings. We are all made to be different and to look different." He listened very intently and nodded his head the whole time. I could tell he was about to burst with something he found important. He said, "Yes, mommy. Jesus made her, but her face looks like this ....."

This is what we call Dane's "Soap Sally" face.

I said, "It does? Well, maybe she lost her smile."

Dane said, "Why, mommy? Why her lost her smile?"

I said, "I don't know. Maybe her life hasn't been easy or she's had a bad day. We never know people's stories until we get to know people. What we have to remember is Jesus tells us to love everyone. Even people who look like this (and I made his Soap Sally face). When we see people who have lost their smile, we need to smile at them and show them the love of Jesus. Maybe when you smile at her, she will be able to find the smile she's lost."

I left it at that and then I hugged him real tight and prayed that I had conveyed an important message to a young child  and that he would really and truly grasp the message behind the words. As I shopped some more, I realized how much I needed to be reminded of that same lesson. How often do I judge on first appearance? How often do I love the "ugly" people (I'm not talking about appearance, but those who have an ugly heart or an ugly personality)? How often do I take time from my day to simply share a smile? I'm afraid I don't follow my own lesson very often. I'm quick to judge and quick to form an opinion on them. I realized how if I expect my children to act and love like that, then I myself need to do those things more often. After all, Dane and Webb take their cues from me. I want them to see Jesus in me, my words, and my actions. I want them to learn what kindness is all about by the way their mommy interacts with friends, family, and even complete strangers. When things go wrong or I am stressed or I'm tired or lines are long and both boys are screaming, I want them to see me act with kindness to them and to the people we come in contact with. I want them to see the love of Jesus flowing through me. I don't want to have to witness verbally to my children (or others), I want them to be able to quietly sit back, watch me, and to see me witness by the way I live my life and the way I treat people.

About 10 minutes after that conversation, I hear Dane loudly proclaim, "Mommy! She smiled at me!!! She found her smile!!" I looked up to see the same lady, she still looked rather unhappy but there was something a little different about her. Yes, I could see it. She had indeed found her smile. She was smiling, a small smile, looking right at my sweet boy. My eyes filled with tears as I realized how important that might have been to that lady. I crouched down again and whispered to Dane, "Yes, she did. I am so proud of you for showing her how to smile. Jesus is proud of you too!" He kept smiling real big and said again with pride, "Mommy, she found her smile." It really was one of my most proud moments as a mom. To see Dane share kindness to an unhappy stranger made my heart very happy.

Indeed, my children teach me something new everyday and sometimes.....they remind me of a lesson I desperately need to hear :D